Ah Yee is a 35-year-old housewife and new immigrant with a daughter. She lived a happy life until her husband died from illness seven years ago. Since then, her life has undergone significant changes.
The death of her husband has dealt Ah Yee a great blow. She was very depressed and subsequently got manic depressive disorder. Adding to her stress was the need to take care of her daughter. As a new immigrant, Ah Yee found herself in a strange environment and community. This apart, she was very annoyed and upset that her neighbours were spreading gossips and rumours about her.
During those years, she became very bad tempered and would severely scold her daughter when the illness struck. She felt gravely depressed every time she thought of her late husband or after a quarrel with her daughter. During the early days of hospitalisation, Ah Yee was emotionally unstable, failing to accept the death of her husband and worrying about her daughter who was studying Secondary 1. She was particularly anxious about her daughter’s academic performance and personal conduct, and whether she would go astray under bad peer influences. Ah Yee told people that she had spent all her time on looking after and teaching her daughter. She could not afford to lose her daughter as she is the only person close to her.
Like many other housewives, Ah Yee has been dedicated to her family and daughter, spending half her life taking care of them. These housewives’ dedication and contribution to their families deserve our respect and appreciation. However, for a long time they have single-mindedly focused on their families and neglected other aspects of life, such as socialising with friends or pursuing personal interest. They do not know how to relieve the pressure on them. One day when their children grow up, they will feel empty and lonely.
In rebuilding Ah Yee’s life, she and I reviewed her past schedule to help her understand that taking care of her daughter is an important part but not all of her life. I suggested her to join the activities organised by the rehabilitation centre for mental patients after her discharge from hospital, so that she can develop her interest and meet more people in the community. Ah Yee took the initiative to go to church where she made a lot of new friends. She also joined the parent-teacher association of her daughter’s school and worked as a volunteer. Early after hospital discharge, Ah Yee always felt tired and did not have enough time to do things. It turned out that she jam packed her days with various tasks, with the hope to improve her life as soon as possible. In doing so, she actually exerted more pressure on herself and made herself exhausted. I therefore reset a more reasonable schedule with Ah Yee to spread out her daily activities. Ah Yee worked according to the new schedule and subsequently made improvements, getting her life back on track.
A balanced lifestyle can help us relieve stress and make our personal developments more dynamic, allowing us to unleash our talents in different areas. Whether you are a youngster, a working folk or a full-time mother, you can always find greater satisfaction and meaning in a balanced mode of life.